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theamazingindi:

spacephantom:

FMK lord farquaad shrek donkey

according to the movies both farquaad and shrek are terrible husbands, one is a tyranical dictator and the other one might fuck up the entirety of time if he gets bored, donkey is clearly the best husband of the three and u kno shrek a freak in the swamp so you kick farquaad’s tiny ass to the curb why is this even a question

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  • 1 hour ago
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heterokay:

technically, your entire life has lead up to the moment you are currently reading this textpost

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angizzoli:

justadashofsarcasm:

deluxetoaster:

can we start a club for teenagers who were constantly complimented on their intelligence when they were younger and are now having trouble coping with the realization that they’re actually of average intellect at best

can this club have a support person that helps us to study because we didn’t need to before so we don’t know how to now 

This is so my life that’s hurt

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eulalius:

gay8:

riddle me this atheists: if god isn’t real then who is inside the kleenex box pushing up the next tissue

Christians: 1 Athiests: 0

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  • hapricityyo lil nigga i believe in u
  • Hahaha ayyyyyy thanks 😎

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Hi everyone. I’m taking my drivers test tomorrow and I have a lot of anxiety. A lot of people say they perform perfectly until the examiner gets in the car with them and then they get really nervous and make dumb mistakes. So I’m really scared and all day long my mom has been telling everyone in my family that she highly doubts I will pass and that she doesn’t trust me to drive on my own and I hate it because I feel like I drive just fine. Any words of encouragement would be extremely beneficial towards my mental health.

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  • #please #personal #ugh
  • 2 hours ago
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zealotarchaeologist:

i stepped on the scale today and it said “bat”

it took me a few seconds to realize it meant the battery was out, but before i realized that i just said “i am not a bat” out loud

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